Darkness Until Dawn

 I think I'm confusing my concepts a little. 

Spidey a liddle INPATIENT. Maybe a bit impulsedive. But di team is hard at werk. As long as dey don't hit me wit di broom, Spidey be ok. Time to get webby...

     Now, there's a concept in Psychology known as nature vs nurture. Not that it's a new concept. Something CCBH clearly did not understand. Blatant stupidity. Anyways, nature is that genetic predisposition and nurture is experience. So, maybe, people understand nature vs. nurture better, we won't need so many drugs and whiteboards.       Children that can self soothe, ones that are given space and taught proper boundaries, those children tend to do better. They have better emotional control. They don't need as many pills.       I definitely had a chaotic childhood. I was definitely not given many choices of my own. I definitely had people bullying me and causing me grief. I definitely became a runner. I definitely learned some self-defense. I definitely have survival mechanisms. I'm definitely at the point of fighting back. Y'all taught me a lot.       I remember Fort McClean. The armoring. I can't see anything...

I had me another idea. See, if I tone it down a little, maybe the medicators will stop getting on my case. Maybe they will mind their own business. Maybe if I stay in the middle and try to enjoy life like Arson said, maybe then people don't need to study me like Arson said. Arson gets good ideas, from time to time. One thing I'm sure of is that people with that name on the building need to tone it down, stop messing with other professionals. Because I know my women are helping me. I know they get tired of the craziness. As amusing as people seem to find it. To me it's such an odd thing. My whole life. It makes little sense. I've been talking about the crazier parts. The dirty laundry parts. There were other parts. That reminds me of switching. They said I had healthy parts and unhealthy parts. You knoooooooooooooow... Maybe this whole sorting professionals thing is like sorting laundry. And it's not just sorting professionals to be cleaned. It's like sorting ide...

Now that the FBI is in town, I don't have to worry about protecting anyone. Because I'm protected. So we need to focus. On getting Clozaril off the market. An apple a day plus the FBI keeps the doctors away. We need to focus on making the de-medicalization of South Carolina permanent. Avoiding toxic masculinity, perfectionism, pushing too hard, too many drugs, dirty money, dirty doctors, dirty pharmacies. So I would hope they are reviewing the medical records. Because the state builds legal cases. That's not my job. I just give them what they need. I need to focus on real life. I need to pick up that Abilify. Maybe the FBI should be checking on the private pharmacy where I got most of the meds. I think Walgreens just doesn't like me because of Theranos. That's ok. I get it. CVS isn't a fan either. But I stick to the natural remedies and the earplugs. The Flonase. People are just concerned, I'm told. People are trying to help. I need to make sure this stays o...

Medicalized perfection is like any other type of engineering. There can be design flaws. That's why I need to help the FDA and Public Health. We missed a few things. A few things that Atlanta and Riggs tried to point out. Clozaril is dangerous. Pushing too hard is dangerous. We need to keep the people safe. No more multistate clusterfucks. I know firsthand. Boston and SC have a few things to work out. Clozaril is dangerous. Some things are permanent. My sense of humor struggles at times. There can only be so much transcendence. Some things need to stop. Clozaril is one. Toxic masculinity is another. Drugs trials from Harvard need very close eyes. Before I start suing half the country. I get it. Doctors want to be proud. Like Military fathers like to be proud. That's ok. But maybe a little less human engineering. Maybe fewer drawing boards around what people should be like. We don't need to be Nazis. We shouldn't act like them. They were the first to mass use amphetamine...

So, I understand that drug trials can be helpful. But, going back to undue influence, patients need to be able to make their own choices. Before they start thinking of suing thier own providers. Or drug companies. Before they start bouncing between offices, ERs and hospitals. Before the FBI steps in. So, I'm happy to help. See, I think the nurses and techs get sick of running around for these doctors. I think musical diagnoses and musical meds is dangerous. I think pushing people so hard and trying to perfect them and antagonizing them with side effects and microanalysis turns them against you. Then you start calling them paranoid, psychotic, bipolar, ptsd, oppositional defiant, fictitious disorders. Things like that. I think some of the EMTs and the counselors and Springbrook understand these things. Then MIP gets all pissed off to be questioned. Woodruff road gets mad. Never mind the guy that worked under church, though I still think he is garbage. I think CBT encourages some unr...